Before the connected, fun, unschooling mamma, there was an uptight, highly strung, business woman,
completely conflicted about the kind of parent she wanted to be,
who gaiged her worthiness, by her busy-ness.
A dedicated people pleaser, over achiever and perfectionist who had no idea who she truly was, doing everything for the prestige, the praise or the pat on the back.
I was the picture of success on the outside, but on the inside I was anxious and DESPERATE for approval.
While my crazy busy corporate and business days saw me Coaching leaders in the finance industry, building and running skate parks and coaching other women in business, I could never have been prepared for the life changing impact of motherhood.
WE WERE RESPECTFUL PARENTING LATE STARTERS: The guilt is real when I say my oldest daughter didn't experience the same respectful, connected start to life my youngest did. While it wasn't all bad, my initial thoughts on parenting were quite traditional. Paired with the pressure I placed myself under with our businesses, working part time in my corporate career and freelance business coaching.....the combo wasn't great. I was rarely 100% present my attention pulled in every direction, I was impatient, cranky,unhappy, highly strung, rushed, stressed and raised my voice more than I'd like, with the fun mamma shining through only on occasion. 😓 Thankfully, children are extremely forgiving.
It began when we started researching schools in my daughter's second year. The more we saw, the more I realised I wasn't comfortable with any of them. The research began and school became less and less appealing to us.
When my son was born, I was very lucky to meet a beautiful women through my 'due in' group who unschooled her children. That was it. After lots of research and discussion, we were hooked. We KNEW this was the best choice for our children. That was the beginning of our life without school and our introduction to respectful parenting.
It became clear the life we were leading was not conducive to the life we desired for our children and ultimately ourselves. But we felt powerless to change it.
The universe dragged as toward our dream life kicking and screaming..... things got much more difficult, before they got better.
After 10 years, our businesses were no longer working for us. They were literally sucking the life (and money) out of us. The emotional, physical and financial pressure was more than we could bare. The extreme stress took it's toll on our family. Times were tough.
There were 1000's of missteps, some of them more than missteps. Some of them big, giant heart wrenching blows but we knew we had to make big changes......for our family.
So we did.
We do our best to strive for these things, but we aren't perfect! It certainly does not look like all sunshine and rainbows at our house. I am not the perfect, respectful parent. I can throw down like a
NOW I SAY THESE FOLLOWING POINTS WITH LOVE: